“I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves. Be on your guard; you will be handed over to the local councils and be flogged in the synagogues. On my account you will be brought before governors and kings as witnesses to them and to the Gentiles. But when they arrest you, do not worry about what to say or how to say it. At that time you will be given what to say, for it will not be you speaking, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.
“Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child; children will rebel against their parents and have them put to death. You will be hated by everyone because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. When you are persecuted in one place, flee to another. Truly I tell you, you will not finish going through the towns of Israel before the Son of Man comes. - Matthew 10:16-23
This passage is hard to read, not because of the difficulty of the scenarios that Jesus' disciples might find themselves in, but because it is hard to image the scenarios happening to any family. How many dramas are built on the backs of a family at odds with each other, whether for the favoritism from one, the inheritance from one, the perceived slight from one, the failures and disappointment. The list goes on and on. I don't like to think of these scenarios because the thoughts in my head required to imagine such circumstances are painful and my brain shies away from them. None of Jesus' disciples were strangers to how this could play out in ordinary life in 1st century Israel.
Now the disciples were followers of a man-a rabbi-Jesus, who they are alternately mystified by or enthralled by. And he seemed to know them so well that he could speak directly to their souls. Sure, he said some pretty abrasive stuff. Sure, he was pretty good a put downs for those who had an overinflated sense of self. Sure, he was really zealous when God's reputation was in question. But to imagine a course of events that would lead people against Jesus and against his followers to such a degree that their own families would turn against them. That's harsh.
I think this is the difference between spiritual childhood and spiritual adulthood. Spiritual adulthood comes when you own what you believe as your own, not as the pattern of spiritual rituals inherited from your parents or learned from the culture around you. Spiritual adulthood is when God is actually your God and not someone you just heard about. In many ways, God can end up being like your unpopular friend. You like him and everything, but who-through no fault of his own-everyone else doesn't like and ridicules. With your friend, you have a choice-you can continue to sit with him at lunchtime or you can pretend that you didn't bring your lunch for a few days so you don't have to sit with him like you used to. I know its weird to put God in that sort of role. Now increase the heat: not only is he unpopular at school, but now your siblings pick on him and your parents don't want you to hang around with him. What to do then? How to navigate "love your father and mother" vs. "love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength"?
Jesus says those tests will come. Maybe not one of the ones listed in these verses. But God will subtly or obviously bring us to a test over and over again and ask us who is more important. He isn't pining away for us, wishing we would choose him. No, instead he is bringing out truths about ourselves and our loyalties that we may not be aware of ourselves. Just like Peter, who thought he was loyal to Jesus, up until the time the rooster crowed. Jesus knew Peter's weakness and told him about it, so he wasn't surprised. The choice became a point of self-knowledge: do I want to be closer to God or not.
I've always asked God to change me slowly, because I am really a coward when it comes to the big failures in my life in terms of choices. I really don't want those super testimonies about failures and God's amazing redemption. I would rather a 1,000 small failures and a 1,000 small redemptions to help me see my need for Jesus and his unmitigated love for me, his son. So I must be willing to be a failure that many times and not grow weary of my missteps because they are all course-corrections in my coming closer to Jesus.
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