1 Timothy 6:6: The Tale of Two CTOs

Just as you must pursue contentment, the paradox is that you also must pursue your dreams wholeheartedly.[1]

This morning I was mulling over a recent decision within my company to give me fewer new requisitions for new employees. I requested the new hires because the roadmap for our product was going to strain the limits of my small team: a new product already committed would start in only three months and we were still putting the finishing touches on our last two products. Yet, as I told my wife, I was at peace with the whole situation, and that struck me as odd, since I'm normally more of the worrier. But not today. My wife's comment was telling: "You have grown in this area."

One of the difficulties for me as an employee is the tension between contentment and dreaming. During my first stint as a CTO (Chief Technology Officer), I was invited to take part in a number of seminars and conferences where they asked my opinion about the pressing industry questions of the day because I was a subject-matter expert (SME). Then I would interact with some of the brightest thinkers in the PC industry, from major computer software and hardware companies about what the future would look like.

Then I would return back to my real job and try to convince the senior management that we should invest in some of these ideas: time, resources and people. But the truth was, we were so intent on the minutiae of day-to-day business that lifting our collective head to look at some of these opportunities was just too much work. So I was schizophrenic, discussing these big ideas with industry leaders but unable to get my company interested in them. The gap between my dreams and my actual situation grew until I gave up my CTO job and went back to being a senior architect.

This tension between longing and satisfaction torments many employees. In general, the American workplace encourages discontent by encouraging us to compare and look for the next opportunity. We are often dared to move, but seldom dared to stay. "Contentment ... is your choice to stay and grow and excel, for a season, regardless of current circumstances."[1]

At the same time, running away fromt the tension-toward complacency-stifles the soul. I backed away from the untenable situation into a role where the dreams were smaller but it was a season of growth in other areas.

Then, several years later, the company went through a bit of a turbulent time and I decided to look around for a new position. During one conversation, the interviewer asked me what position I was interviewing for and I was stumped! I had to ask to reschedule the rest of the interview! So I went away and when we talked again, I was ready: "CTO" The dream had been reignited and my fears had abated, so that I was willing again--this time in a larger company.

Even then I wasn't sure of my motives. During times of prayer over the next few weeks I prayed that my heart would be ready to hear God's "yes" or "no" to this new position-to surrender my goals into his hands with equanimity. Honestly, I was ready.

God did place me in a new company. But I will not forget the lessons of contentment vs. dreaming.

This plays into our spiritual lives as well. Paul said:

But godliness with contentment is great gain. - 1 Timothy 6:6

Godliness can be a demanding task master, if we let it. With Jesus as the highest standard, everything can be more, more, better, better, whether personally, working with a church or in serving others. After all, it was Paul who said, "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:12) The difference between the dream of who I could be, or how the church could be, can drive you crazy with discontent.[2]

But Jesus also said, "[Y]ou will find rest for your souls. My yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:30). Any time I find that the gap between my dreams and my satisfaction is too large, I realize I have tied myself to the wrong taskmaster--it isn't Jesus. Many times, it is the slow, steady plodding through today that brings me to the place where God wants me to be.




[1] As highlighted previously in this blog series. See Leading from the Second Chair, M. Bonem & R. Patterson.
[2] The context, before and after, is dealing with money. Paul applies this general principle of the relationship between godliness and contentment to the specific case of people trying to get ahead financially. Godliness without contentment is discontented, even arrogant ambition. Contentment without godliness is either complacent or misdirected. Without godliness or contentment you have the fool of Proverbs.

Ecclesiastes 5:2: The Gap Between Me and My Words

Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. - Ecclesiastes 5:2a

God grant me space between me and the things I say so that I may choose the best. Sometimes this gap is time, between what I hear and my reaction and what I say. That gap helps with angry, hasty words.

Many times the words that come out are malformed, muddy and unhelpful. My first self-the self that reacts-is authentic, but it reflects who I am rather than who I am becoming in Christ. My second self-the self that considers-uses that God-gifted gap to speak words of life. Our culture values the authentic, because that same gap that can be used for grace can also be used for hypocrisy and image management.

Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. - Proverbs 16:24

The first self has been rooted in my life since the beginning and usually has first access to my mouth. The second self-the one being transformed by God-is the latecomer but fueled by the Spirit of God.

Today, my pastor said that we also grant space to others by listening well. My first self wants to fill in that gap with my story. My second self wants to hear their story well.

With my friends and colleagues from the Philippines, Taiwan and mainland China, when I ask a question there is often a pause-a silence. One reason for this is their respect for me, waiting to see if I will continue. Another reason is when the dialog is in English, it is often their second or third language and it takes time to parse the flow of words. I have experienced this delay-to-parse myself on Philippine Airlines flights, trying to understand the in-flight announcements in Filipino. It just takes time.

For me, that 2-3 second silence is uncomfortable. Sometimes I interpret that lack of response as either license to continue or failure to communicate. So, I start talking again and my friend's opinion is never spoken nor heard. A mistake that leaves me impoverished.

God grant the gap to let the second self respond in grace. God grant the gap to let another speak well-heard.

Esther 4: Wide Awake in the Second Chair

If being "deep" in your position means excelling, then "wide" means collaborating. Not content to focus on the narrow confines of your job description, the "wide" worker is looking out for what is best for the entire organization. Your competence (or depth) is what gives you credibility to speak into others.

The show Undercover Boss shows what happens when the CEO of a corporation steps into the role of an ordinary worker in their company. Their normal role as the leader isolates them from pertinent issues for their workers, managers and customers. There is humor and irony as these CEOs see the truth in their own company and how it is affecting its health.

One of the roles of a good worker is listening to what is going on around you and taking the group or organization's pulse.[1] This means listening well. Knowing what people are thinking and feeling in an organization is valuable. Many times, managers and leaders are cocooned from what is going on around them. Maybe it is being filtered-people just don't tell them what they think. Maybe the day-to-day requirements of a leader's position reinforce a focus on particular issues that leave some things un-addressed. But for one reason or another, your boss is missing out on a vital fact: morale is low, friction is rising, solutions are being overlooked, a train wreck is coming. Part of being a good worker is helping avoid surprises. If there is a problem, its better they find out from you before the phone rings.

The Bible narratives describe this role and its effect a few different times. But Mordecai springs to mind. He was hanging around the gate and heard about a plot to kill the king. He gave the info to Esther and the conspirators were caught. Later, he hears the rumors about Haman's plot, gathers documentary evidence and gives it to Esther so she can make her fateful decision.  (Esther 4).

Jesus asked his disciples: Who do people say that I am? (Matt. 16) The disciples came back with what they had heard. Whether Jesus already knew the answer is not clear, but he clearly knew and expected that his followers were keeping the pulse of the crowd. They needed to understand the gap between people's perceptions of their mission (Elijah, John the Baptist, Jeremiah) and the real mission (Messiah, church).

You can see it with Daniel (see ch. 2), even the Pharaoh's baker in the story of Joseph! I don't want to stretch these Bible examples too far. They aren't exact parallels. But in each case listening to hear what people were thinking and feeling was valued, it helped the leader avoid a train wreck and God used it to advance his purposes. It doesn't always lead to their advancement. But it leads to the purposes of God advancing. And this wasn't in church, it was pagan government.

One of the ways I've seen this work is in regard to morale. For much of my career, I've worked either for company A, but my office was actually inside company B, or I've worked at home. One of the great fears for employees like me is that we will be forgotten, passed over and ignored. They often can't take part in our company's parties (because they're remote) and they can't take part in their host company's parties (because its for that company's employees only). When they are talking layoffs, we hope they don't remember us. When they are talking raises and promotions, we hope they do remember us!

As such, I am particularly sensitive to signs that engineers in a similar situation within my company are feeling low. I, myself, look for ways to challenge and encourage them, and I help my bosses remember how certain actions will be perceived by those who aren't sitting in a cubicle in our office. This isn't a major thing, but it is one where I have seen God use my ears to help extend my boss' understanding. This is one way I am growing as a "wide" worker.

----

[1] I was introduced to this term in Leading From The Second Chair, M. Bonem & R. Patterson. For an excellent summary, see Rich Woods, Leaders Book Summaries, http://www.richwoods.org/richwoods/greenhouse/Second_Chair.pdf, retrieved March 9, 2017.

James 4:13-15: Going and Sending

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” - James 4:13-15

Today, as I was flying to Boston for business and staring out the window, I was praying that God would invite me into whatever he was doing in the place he was sending me. Then it occurred to me that wherever I am going today for work was actually a place he was sending me. Wherever I go, there the kingdom of God is, because of his sovereign claim on my life. So I'd better be sure I was sent.

I think that's why James speaks so strongly to business people. If we think that we are going because of our business, "you boast in your arrogant schemes." (vs. 16).

There is nothing wrong with taking risks, being entrepreneurial, and building a business as long as we realized that God is already on the other side of what we are planning. He has been there already. He has seen the aftermath of your venture. He has seen the result of our plan. And maybe it isn't his plan, and maybe it isn't his best.

So I take a different approach: I am being sent into a situation where God is already at work and he is inviting me to join him, even for the span of a few days. I pray that my eyes will be open to what is happening. I pray that my heart will be humble to trade my agenda for his. I pray that his kingdom will be furthered, not mine. I'm here as a part of my job, but I'd prefer he supercede. As tobyMac says, "Steal my show."

It is curious to me that before Jesus left, his followers were called disciples-followers. But after he left, his disciples were called apostles-sent ones. "As the Father has sent me, I am sending you." (John 20:21)

I could say I made my plane reservations (I did) for my business reasons (I did). But God has his own purposes for letting me go. God does not just rubber-stamp my itinerary as his plan. Rather, he is utilizing my life, in all its journeys, to make his point. If he didn't want me to go, he could have told me (by his Spirit) or diverted me, or stopped me. James notes that I am just a mist. My plans don't stand a chance compared to the power of God, if he wants something else.

We can too easily set up our goal as if it is the reason for going. But today, as I landed in Logan International Airport, I am going because God was sending me into what he was already doing.

Daniel 1: Deep and Wide, There's a Fountain Flowing

Hiring the best did not pull the team together. Each person came aggressive and passionate for his or her own ministry without commitment to the whole. People were not recruited and hired to join a coherent and unified movement. - Simple Church, T. Rainer and E. Geiger

What makes a good staff member. As Simple Church points out, just "hiring thoroughbreds" and "letting them run" doesn't lead to healthy organizations. This is one of the key tensions described in Leading from the Second Chair: Deep vs. wide.

"Deep" is reflected in how well you carry out the responsibilities of your role. Do you do your job well? The software engineer in me liked solving problems well, devising elegant and functional solutions, learning from really smart people and passing on what I knew to others. Later, as a team lead, architect and CTO, there was an interpersonal aspect; working with teams, persuading others, and communicating clearly. People talk with me expecting clear answers and doable solutions. For other jobs, there may be less technical expertise and more people expertise involved. I have come to respect, for example, project managers, who are responsible for schedules and yet don't have the power to make those schedules happen except through people skills. The best show a level of creative thinking, perseverance and willingness to take heat for the team that I truly admire.

"Wide" is reflected in how your awareness of the situation in the rest of the organization. Good workers see the big picture, identify the greater opportunities or pressing problems and take initiative. Organizational silos naturally build up in an organization in order to optimize what that silo does. I like silos. I like the general surgeon model that allows me to hyper-focus on my problems and my solutions and what I need to solve them. But we need to think wider than that.

Why? Because when each business unit or ministry becomes a kingdom, it fosters unhealthy competition rather than collaboration. I've seen reputation-depending, locked-down, no discussion, envious, passive-aggressive, finger pointing, only-vertical communication styles that cripple managers and companies. Division of labor is a useful thing, but the stress brought about by the change inherent in every organization's life cycle inevitably challenges the kingdom boundaries we set up.

This is a tension to be managed, not a problem to be solved. We need competent people, teams, groups and divisions. We also need collaborative people, teams, groups and divisions. And these both need time, attention and resources taken from a finite pool. So we manage the tension.

We see some of these in the life of Daniel:

To these four young men God gave knowledge and understanding of all kinds of literature and learning. And Daniel could understand visions and dreams of all kinds...In every matter of wisdom and understanding about which the king questioned them, he found them ten times better than all the magicians and enchanters in his whole kingdom.- Daniel 1:17

This was an unpleasant work environment. Daniel and his friends were new, recently displaced and from a completely different culture. There was huge pressure to conform (1:10, 311-12). God gave them insight and talent, they were diligent in their studies and their excellence was, in due time, rewarded with recognitions. Like Joseph, they put in extended periods of time without tangible rewards (cf. Daniel 1:5, "three years")

This was a high pressure environment. The boss (King Nebuchadnezzar) was not always reasonable and had a penchant for axing (literally, 2:8), burning (3:21) or "throwing to the lions" (literally) those who disappointed him. Even more discouraging, their job success depended on making the government headed by this self-centered maniac succeed and prosper (cf. Jer. 29) Let that sink in for a moment.

This was a back-biting environment. Success was rewarded but also brought envy. Others mini-kingdoms were being threatened by the rising prominence of the outside recruits.God deliberately stirred up the government and religious leaders of Babylon to accomplish his goals. He brought in young men, tested their character and gave them insight and talent to disrupt the status quo for his glory. But the status quo disrupted right back with gossip, traps and sanctioned violence.

In this environment, just remember: God knows it all first. No matter what your field of expertise, God has already discovered what can be discovered and thought what can be thought. God never watches you and goes, "I wish I'd thought of that." Instead, we are following after him. He delights in showing us more. Daniel said, "there is a God in heaven who reveals mysteries." (Dan. 2:28a) It wasn't only spiritual stuff that God revealed, but he also taught them "all kinds of literature and learning." One of the sharp contrasts in Daniel's life is between those who give credit to God for their success (Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego) and those who do not (Nebuchadnezzar, Belshazzar)/

It is satisfying to be the master of your area of expertise or manage your group productively. But you can gain still meet every group goal and objective and your organization can still fall apart. That's were the wide perspective comes in, which we will look at more in depth next time.
.