Revelation 5:11-14: Doing My Bit To Give God Credit

Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand. They encircled the throne and the living creatures and the elders. In a loud voice they were saying: “Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and strength and honor and glory and praise!”

Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, saying: “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be praise and honor and glory and power, for ever and ever!” 

The four living creatures said, “Amen,” and the elders fell down and worshiped.

 Sometimes we worry about boasting, because we know, in our heart of hearts, that we don't deserve the praise that goes with that boasting. We aren't really that great. We don't really deserve all of that credit. There were many people, circumstances and other factors which led to the success that we've enjoyed. So, rather than shout our own praises, we sit quiet and hope that someone else notices what we've done.

In this scene, we have millions of angels flying around the throne of God and essentially saying: "Whatever praises could be imagined, you deserve it." Sometimes it must get tiring being God, doing all this good stuff like maintaining the universe and handing out blessings and orchestrating salvation and no one seems to notice. But in this heavently scene, everyone gets it and they are not quiet about who should get all of the credit.

I like to imagine myself in this scene, down in the bottom left corner of heaven, doing my bit to give God all of the credit. I guess I could even start today.

Acts 9:1-20: No More Sense of Self-Managed Worth

Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”

“Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked.

“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”

The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone. Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything.

In Damascus there was a disciple named Ananias. The Lord called to him in a vision, “Ananias!”

“Yes, Lord,” he answered.

The Lord told him, “Go to the house of Judas on Straight Street and ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul, for he is praying. In a vision he has seen a man named Ananias come and place his hands on him to restore his sight.”

“Lord,” Ananias answered, “I have heard many reports about this man and all the harm he has done to your holy people in Jerusalem. And he has come here with authority from the chief priests to arrest all who call on your name.”

But the Lord said to Ananias, “Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.”

Then Ananias went to the house and entered it. Placing his hands on Saul, he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord—Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here—has sent me so that you may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” Immediately, something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes, and he could see again. He got up and was baptized, and after taking some food, he regained his strength.

Saul spent several days with the disciples in Damascus. At once he began to preach in the synagogues that Jesus is the Son of God. - Acts 9:1-20

 God had to speak to two people that day in Damascus. Both had to give up their preconceived ideas in order for God to use them. 

The first was Saul. It says he was "breathing murderous threats against the Lord's disciples." He had built his identity around being the most zealous of the Pharisees, with no squishy (no gray) in how he felt about Jews who thought Jesus was the Messiah. They were either good Jews or else they were heretic Jesus Jews. For him to change his mind about Jesus was to say that his previous energy was wasted and in the wrong direction. 

I think that we sometimes fail to appreciate how much has to be given up when we say Jesus is Lord. How much of our identity must be reformed and our previous decisions and priorities questioned and, in many cases, tossed out the window. Paul could no longer claim to be one of the "good Jews" because he had met Jesus the Messiah. How does it feel to realize that you aren't "good" any more, and realize that that is actually ok. To be reformed without trying to cling to any sense of self-managed worth.

The second was Ananias (and, by extension the rest of the disciples). The question for them was: do you believe that God really changes people? I think that we, as Christians, believe in the theoretical possibility of someone's life being turned around but if we catalog all of our acquaintances, there are those who we categorize as "extremely unlikely" to change and therefore we don't waste our hope or prayers on them. That begs the question: does God merely nudge those who are already almost in the kingdom over the edge or does he push the hard-headed over the precipice. I guess I have to ask what he did with me: did here he merely nudge or did he push? I like to think I only needed a nudge, that I was basically almost there which basically minimizes my sinfulness into an inconvenience, not something which needed salvation.

Ananias clearly placed Saul (by reputation) in the second group: the hard cases. In some ways, he also wasn't sure whether Saul was in a position to be changed or whether God would choose to exercise enough of his power to change Saul. Whether God was in power-save mode. I mean if God was willing to expend enough energy to save a Saul, a 10 on the tough-nut scale, couldn't he do better to save 10 people who were just 1s? 

Haiku: February 18 - May 5

 Chill of the morning 
Finds only the brave go out
With hands in pockets

Restless thoughts adorn 
My head on the sleepless nights
Sparkle like dark thorns. 

Assume it's just one
And it will turn out all right.
We're talking waffles.

Small cat paused near door
Unaware we watched nearby
Slipped into the fog

What is the morning
But the cessation of sleep
And opening eyes?

An obligation
To repay a debt incurred
A heavy burden.

First flower blooming
Adorn the trees and meadows
Shake off winter's gloom.

Cannot sleep any more
Sun peeking in the window.
Might as well get up.

Walk on gilded paths.
Lined golden with fallen leaves.
And edged in shadow.

Piles of grey clouds loom.
Lie on morning's horizon.
Rain is expected.

Cherry blossoms drift
Settle to the ground softly
Stirred by the breezes.

Lemon aroma.
Shiny green leaves fill one side
And block the neighbor.

Move the clocks one hour.
Lose an hour, not recovered
Til later this year.

Dead bugs on the floor.
Are the last things I want to see.
Because they have friends.

Path winds between trees.
Lazily without purpose.
Until the meadow.

Rocks piled remember.
The divide we agreed upon.
Don't move one further. 

Clouds break, grey to blue.
Haze obscuring the distance.
But its clear nearby.

Do not move the stones.
Set up by your forefathers.
Someone will notice.

Water dripping down.
The window outside my house
Until the sun peeks out. 

Whimsical wind blows. 
Tossing leaves and toppling pots.
Tugging on jackets.

Angry loud voices.
Rough threats in the evening.
What will the night bring?

Days like falling petals.
Lie unappreciated.
Under passing feet.

Settting aside clothes 
To put in traveling bags
To fly tomorrow. 

Rain in the gutters.
The early morning pattern.
Making me get up. 

Smell of dough rising
Coffee gurgling and gasping
Promising morning.

No five seven five.
No three lines and nature themes.
No haiku for me.

Dew drops on a leaf.
Before the sunlight hits the lawn.
Cat pauses mid-stride.

Ponder the music.
No words but something is stirred.
Then it fades away.

Under the white moon.
Along the brightly lit strees.
We walked happily.

As a child I thought.
The dark was a scary place.
Now dawn is too bright.

On April mornings
The air is full of bird sounds. 
Oh what a racket.

In distance calling.
Gesturing for us to see.
What you are doing. 

Heady, stinky blooms.
Of plums and cherry flowers.
How I miss this place!

If the world stopped today. 
Would there be something undone?
Or would the world go on?

There is not much more
I can do to make this move
Faster, but I try.

In late night meetings
My mind wanders, before I sleep.
Start dreaming early.

Tasks remain undonw.
Who takes the shift while I sleep?
Can I trust you, Lord?

Morning birds chatter
Who knows what they talk about.
Later, they're quiet.

You think I don't know.
That's ok. Leave it that way.
Maybe we'll both leave.

Listen long enough.
I'll figure out what you mean.
And then I'll look smart.

Luke 13:1-9: Am I Especially Good?

Now there were some present at that time who told Jesus about the Galileans whose blood Pilate had mixed with their sacrifices. Jesus answered, “Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans because they suffered this way? I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish. Or those eighteen who died when the tower in Siloam fell on them—do you think they were more guilty than all the others living in Jerusalem? I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish.”

Then he told this parable: “A man had a fig tree growing in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, ‘For three years now I’ve been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven’t found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?’

“‘Sir,’ the man replied, ‘leave it alone for one more year, and I’ll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.’” - Luke 13:1-9

It is interesting to me that those who asked Jesus about the mixing of Galilean blood seem to be asking Jesus if the Galileans were particularly sinful. If it was me, I would have been asking Jesus to pronounce judgement on the Romans, not the Galileans. Then Jesus uses another example: residents of Jerusalem who died when a tower collapsed. Did they die because they were especially bad?

It is easy to find reasons why victims of a tragedy are victims. We always are trying to find reasons for why things are the way things are. We are trying to find a reason because we are trying to defend God's choices about who dies and who lives--as if he needed defending. 

But searching for the sins of a the victims in a tragedy is asking the wrong question. Rather than asking why they suffered, we should be asking why we aren't suffering. I am so full of mixed motives sometimes that I'm sure that it would be simpler for God to just remove me from the scene so he would have fewer moving pieces to worry about. But he doesn't. By his mercy, I'm still around. 

The next verses about the fruitless fig tree give us a clue: the man tending the fig trees asks for just one more year to let the fig have time to finally bear fruit. Figs typically bear fruit within 3-5 years. So if the tree in Jesus' story isn't bearing fruit after 3, it isn't because it is a waste of soil and sunlight. The tree just needs a little time to reach the potential that was there in that tree when it was planted.

God looks at us and while some might think: what a waste of food and oxygen, He can see the full potential that he put within us when he created us and then saved us. He has a plan and he does not cut short that plan when we are inconvenient to him. Rather he lets us live until the potential he sees in us comes to fruition. Or he cuts us short when his plan has run its cource.

Not because we were better or worse than other people, but because he has a race for us to run.