1 Samuel 1:4-20: Brave Enough To Trust Him Now

Whenever the day came for Elkanah to sacrifice, he would give portions of the meat to his wife Peninnah and to all her sons and daughters. But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the Lord had closed her womb. Because the Lord had closed Hannah’s womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the Lord, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. Her husband Elkanah would say to her, “Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?”

Once when they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh, Hannah stood up. Now Eli the priest was sitting on his chair by the doorpost of the Lord’s house. In her deep anguish Hannah prayed to the Lord, weeping bitterly. And she made a vow, saying, “Lord Almighty, if you will only look on your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the Lord for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head.”

As she kept on praying to the Lord, Eli observed her mouth. Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk and said to her, “How long are you going to stay drunk? Put away your wine.”

“Not so, my lord,” Hannah replied, “I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the Lord. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.”

Eli answered, “Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him.”

She said, “May your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast.

Early the next morning they arose and worshiped before the Lord and then went back to their home at Ramah. Elkanah made love to his wife Hannah, and the Lord remembered her. So in the course of time Hannah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel, saying, “Because I asked the Lord for him.”

When her husband Elkanah went up with all his family to offer the annual sacrifice to the Lord and to fulfill his vow, Hannah did not go. She said to her husband, “After the boy is weaned, I will take him and present him before the Lord, and he will live there always.”

“Do what seems best to you,” her husband Elkanah told her. “Stay here until you have weaned him; only may the Lord make good his word.” So the woman stayed at home and nursed her son until she had weaned him.

After he was weaned, she took the boy with her, young as he was, along with a three-year-old bull, an ephah of flour and a skin of wine, and brought him to the house of the Lord at Shiloh. When the bull had been sacrificed, they brought the boy to Eli, and she said to him, “Pardon me, my lord. As surely as you live, I am the woman who stood here beside you praying to the Lord. I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord.” And he worshiped the Lord there.

The opinions of your rivals are not the opinions of God. People can make you feel miserable for something about which the Lord has the opposite opinion. Penenniah was probably insecure, seeing her husband favor the other wife. She was successful in the eyes of the people around her, increasing Elkanah's family with numerous happy events. But still he preferred her and gave her the special attention, like the double portion of the meat from the offering. So she took the one thing that was different between them-the ability to readily bear children-and attempted to make it the prime attribute by which Elkanah, her husband, should use to judge between them. Further, she used it as the attribute to continually remind Hannah aboutn And it was the attribute that the people around her would use as a sign that God was surely blessing her--not that other woman. She was insecure and used what she had to push Hannah down and it worked, making Hannah feel trapped and helpless and miserable. So she prayed.

One of the remarkable things about Hannah's response was that she wanted the answer to the prayer, but when she got it, she did not try to hold on so tightly. It reminds me of the way that Abraham was so desperate for a son that he manipulated things to try and get one in a way not ordained by God, using other people to try and make it happen. But at the end, when God demanded that he give Isaac as a sacrifice, he set out the next day to do it. He had learned to let go. 

So Hannah kept the child Samuel but then let him go. In many ways, that is what we do with children anyway. We raise them and then have to give them over to God. If we fail to do that, then we hurt them and dishonor God in thinking that he's not capable of raising them. I don't know that I would be as brave as Hannah at such a young age for my children, but I do hope I can be brave enough to trust him now.

Haiku: September 27-November 10

Air is still and warm
Yesterday the wind's blowing

Leaves return then fall.

Anxious thoughts untested

Seldom pausing or resting

Then I close my eyes.

The heat of summer

Lingers in the tree leaves

Before they change colors.

Anger never solves

Except for further anger--

To provide fuel.

When the week looks long,

One dose of inspiration

Is all that I need.

Mornings hold no chill

Skies promises no remorse

With relentless blue

Day looms with a cloud

I wish I could go back to bed

But the clock insists.

Hummingbirds sip tea

While watching their enemies

Drink on their enemies.

Only one problem 

Will keep me awake at night.

The moon is my friend. 

Gathering people. 

The murmur of soft voices

Then the first chord plays. 

Wrinkles seldom shock

Except when you smile or frown

More as you're older.

A man speaks no words

So he is considered wise

Even if he's a fool.

Carrots for rabbits

And apples fed to horses

Then cheese for the mouse

Heavy winds on shore

Shelter in place, run to hid

There is no place safe.

Half cup of water

Dirty dishes are waiting

Need to make breakfast.

Sat on wooden seats

Then to the padding of trains

Then to my pillow

I really should wake

Or do the thing I should do

Instead close my eyes.

The bird silhouettes

Apples sit on the table

Early morning light.

Hummingbird pauses

Takes a sip before going.

Watering house plants.

The world is quiet

In the dark of the morning

A cat wanders by.

The moon has risen

I survey the night landscape.

Owls glide silently.

Why am I worried?

I awake with the unanswered.

Lingering alert

Dig lawn in the front

Looking for grubs messily

At night, what is it?

Sleepy on the brain

Sunlight pays across my eyes

Rustling sounds behind

The smell of baked bread

Meets me when I come home

And a playful smile.

Studying Bible

Morning talks with friends go long

Excitement lingers

Did I learn new things?

Or learn how to use the old?

Each is exciting.

Flights home are waiting

But something is left behind

I'll go out again

Scream of winter jays

Bold because chicken is gone.

Taking the back yard.

Sleepy eyed morning.

The sky shifting and blue

My mind is waking.

Journal, bible, book.

Laid open on the table

All is in order.

Tree is tilted

Grape vine's trellis fell over

The wind has come through.

Look out the back door

The feel of the chill in the air.

Back in for a coat.

Looking for reasons.

Why are one more and one less. 

My reasons fail God.

The walk together.

Lightly discussing the day.

Then we fall silent.

Peach and green pumpkins

Resting on the side table.

Not to be eaten.

Reading the poems

Makes me think, chuckle, wince, cry, 

All in three brief lines

The Tales Of Fred And George: Chapter 6

Fred was a snake, green and glorious. George was a turtle, mottled green and yellow and slow. They were friends, or at least one of them thought so.

But they both knew Bernadette, the sleek red racer from up the river who made Fred's tongue skip a slither whenever he thought of her.  They were a couple. Or at least one of them thought so. 

Fred was determined that Bernadette would see him for a sly smooth talker--the way he saw himself. But so far, his attempts to impress had been met with less than spectacular results. In fact, an outside observer might rightfully concluded that she didn't really know that Fred existed and when he thought deeply, that single thought crushed Fred's not-insubstantial ego.

How to get Bernadette to notice him? Toss that. How to get Bernadette to like him? He had tried to parade in front of his neighbors with her present. Failure. What he needed was for Bernadette to catch him in the act of some feat of derring-do! 

As he usually did when contemplating these deep questions, he went to consult with his friend George, who was idly circumnavigating one of the ponds formed by the handiwork of beavers in search for water bugs and small fish. And that was how most of George's days proceeded: wake, onto the log to catch the first rays of the morning sun, swim around the pond for lunch, another long stretch on the sun-warmed rocks with legs extended and then a quick nose around for dinner. 

Except when Fred happened by. Fred was one of the few sources of unadulterated excitement in George's life, so he always had time for Fred.

This time, Fred came to the edge of the slow eddy along the bank of the stream and gesticulated wildly to get George's attention, which involved waving his head back and forth in rapid movements and hoping that George noticed or at least heard his whispery voice from the short. Finally George happened to swivel around and catch a glimpse of Fred's green dance on the short. 

"Hmmm?" he said, his mouth still full of cricket. 

"George!" Fred exclaimed. "You must help me, my friend. It is of the utmost import!"

George's heart managed to accelerate by a single beat per minute at the thought of his supreme importance. "Fred. Did...something...happen?"

"No, no nothing happened." Fred twitched impatiently.

"Oh." And George started to turn away.

"Nothing has happened yet. It is what must happen that is important." Fred quickly supplied.

"Oh. What must happen, Fred?" George queried, his heart accelerating yet one more beat.

"Well I don't rightly know, George." Fred answered.

"Oh." And George started to turn away, thinking where his next cricket might come from. Maybe by the tuft of dried grass?

"Wait! That's why I need your help. I need to know how to get Bernadette to be impressed with me. She's quite the fine red racer and I would like to know her. You know, she would like me if she knew--if she saw how impressive I was."

"Hmmm...well, Fred, I don't know. What is so impressive about you?"

Fred was flabbergasted. I mean, this was his friend, right?

"I mean....I mean, I'm green....Oh...you were suggesting that I should I enumerate my outstanding qualities."

"Mmmm... yes, why would a snake of Bernadette's quality pay attention to you?"

"Well, really, George...oh, you did it again." Fred cocked his head to one side, his tongue flicking in and out idly. "Well, one, I am good looking." He struck several poses before his reflection in the still water at the river bank.  "Yes, very fine. Two, I am famous in this forest." 

Calling out to a passing otter in the river, he said, "Warren! Yes, over here on the shore. Warren, who am I?" "Why you are that snake that tricked me out of my second fish the other day!" answered the irritated otter. "See, famous among forest folk. Third, I slither swiftly." And he dashed around the base of the tree and then up to its lowest branches, so quickly that George lost sight of him. "Fred? Fred?" he called before he glimpsed Fred's form above him. "Oh, there you are Fred!"

"And, then, fourth and most importantly, I am clever and persuasive. Yes, very clever."

"Fred...how will you show that you are clever?"

"Well, I need to think about that bit for someone as humble as I am, not used to showing off or anything." And he went back to his thinking spot, high in the elm tree and George went back to his nibbling of stream-side water cress and afternoon swims.

Kidnapped by Raven, paid for by Fred for coin, freed by Fred when Raven lands, Bernadette's not there as arranged.

 

Ah, that is the brilliant part. Bernadette will see that I am a snake above the ordinary. Fred can rescue someone from the most dire of circumstances."

Mark 10:46-52: More Disappointing To Never Ask

Then they came to Jericho. As Jesus and his disciples, together with a large crowd, were leaving the city, a blind man, Bartimaeus (which means “son of Timaeus”), was sitting by the roadside begging. When he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”

Many rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”

Jesus stopped and said, “Call him.”

So they called to the blind man, “Cheer up! On your feet! He’s calling you.” Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus.

“What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asked him.

The blind man said, “Rabbi, I want to see.”

“Go,” said Jesus, “your faith has healed you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road. - Mark 10:46-52

 I think that people who are living with a person with some sort of weakness often have a co-dependent relationship with the people around them. That is, when they try to do something different or get out of the environment that they are in, the other people rally around to keep them in that situation. The people in Jericho that day, they were comfortable with Bartimaeus the beggar. He was always there at the gate, asking for coins outside the city gate. He heard the sounds around Jesus the Messiah coming through town and made a play on the mercy of Jesus. The people told him to be quiet. This was Jesus and here he was making a bad final impression on the rabbi leaving town. They didn't need him healed, but they did need Jesus. So they told him to stay back.

But he went against them and continued to call out for Jesus. Who knows what he was actually expecting to happen. Maybe he thought Jesus, as a good rabbi, would give him some money. Maybe he thought by calling Jesus the Messiah ('son of David') he might get something more.  Interestingly, Jesus didn't pay attention to the crowds, but listened to the noisy, annoying shouts of the beggar. Amid all that noise, Jesus picked Bartimaeus' voice. 

He was bold. When told that Jesus' stopped, he went quickly. When asked what he wanted by Jesus, he asked boldly, not for the easy ask, but for his sight back. And Jesus gave it to him because of his faith--his trust--that Jesus could actually do it.

I think we are sometimes hesitant to ask God for things. He is not obligated to give anything. But sometimes the very act of asking says that we believe God could do it, if he wanted. Not asking is to express doubt that God would ever turn his favor on us. It is disappointing to have God say 'No' to something we prayed for, but it is even more disappointing to have us never ask.

Hebrews 7:23-28: No Term Limits for Jesus

Now there have been many of those priests, since death prevented them from continuing in office; but because Jesus lives forever, he has a permanent priesthood. Therefore he is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede for them.

Such a high priest truly meets our need—one who is holy, blameless, pure, set apart from sinners, exalted above the heavens. Unlike the other high priests, he does not need to offer sacrifices day after day, first for his own sins, and then for the sins of the people. He sacrificed for their sins once for all when he offered himself. For the law appoints as high priests men in all their weakness; but the oath, which came after the law, appointed the Son, who has been made perfect forever. - Hebrews 7:23-28

The Pharisees of Jesus time had two conflicting problems: how to maintain the  relative peace (albeit under the thumb of the Romans) and how to disrupt that peace if the Messiah should come.  The New Testament period featured several attempts by would-be Messiahs to push the Romans out. These attempts would continue with the armed uprising in 70 AD continuing until about AD 135 with the final rebellion led by Simon Bar Kokhba. That means, shortly after Hebrews was written, the temple was destroyed, all residents of Jerusalem were forcibly exiled and foreigners were settled in much of Israel. No temple, no Jerusalem and no land. 

This was partly the result of unresolved tensions, not between Israel and Rome, but within Judaism itself. Since the time of Moses, Israel understood the the priesthood was supposed to be held by descendants of Aaron, from the tribe of Levi and the after the time of King Saul, the kingship was supposed to be held by descendants of David, from the tribe of Judah. But in the time of Jesus, the king (King Herod) was not a Jew at all. He did not report to God but instead directly reported to Caesar.  In the time of Jesus, the temple was not the first temple (build by David), nor the second temple (build after Nehemiah and Ezra), but a third temple built by this king Herod and governed by high priests hand picked by the king. Herod installed a rotating line up of Sadducees as high priest who we more liberal in their outlook and who accommodated Herod's moral failings (see John the Baptist!).

Into this setting, the author of Hebrew asserts that Jesus was superior to all of the high priests, past or present. He also wasn't a Levite (like Herod) but the author asserts that he comes from another priestly lineage--one whom pre-dated even their forefathers Abraham, Moses or Aaron-Melchezidek. He performed sacrifices, interceded with God and accepted the tithes of Abraham.

Priests acted as intermediaries between God and man, a bridge between the worlds, meeting the requirements of both the holiness of God and the participation in the suffering of man. As Hebrews says, "Such a high priest truly meets our need—one who is holy, blameless, pure, set apart from sinners, exalted above the heavens." Jesus did these perfectly. He can hear our prayers, sympathize with our weakness and lead us into righteousness. And he can do this always because he still lives and he didn't get replaced when his "term" was over. 

To me, the part that speaks most closely to my heart is that he can sympathize with the weakness that comes from being human and what comes from being tempted.  (not just the weakness due to sin) Hebrews says he can empathize with us and deal gently with us. "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin." (Hebrews 4:15) and "He is able to deal gently with those who are ignorant and are going astray, since he himself is subject to weakness." (Hebrews 5:2) Frankly, this is what I hope for-not a strict moralist but a loving savior.

Job 42:1-17: That's The Genius of God

Then Job replied to the Lord: “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’  Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know. “You said, ‘Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer me.’ My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes.”

After the Lord had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has. So now take seven bulls and seven rams and go to my servant Job and sacrifice a burnt offering for yourselves. My servant Job will pray for you, and I will accept his prayer and not deal with you according to your folly. You have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has.” So Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite did what the Lord told them; and the Lord accepted Job’s prayer.

After Job had prayed for his friends, the Lord restored his fortunes and gave him twice as much as he had before. All his brothers and sisters and everyone who had known him before came and ate with him in his house. They comforted and consoled him over all the trouble the Lord had brought on him, and each one gave him a piece of silver and a gold ring. The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part. He had fourteen thousand sheep, six thousand camels, a thousand yoke of oxen and a thousand donkeys. And he also had seven sons and three daughters. The first daughter he named Jemimah, the second Keziah and the third Keren-Happuch. Nowhere in all the land were there found women as beautiful as Job’s daughters, and their father granted them an inheritance along with their brothers.

After this, Job lived a hundred and forty years; he saw his children and their children to the fourth generation. And so Job died, an old man and full of years. - Job 42:1-17

 "You have not spoken the truth about me..." Twice God hands out this indictment to the friends of Job. It is a bit strange, since from a casual reading of the first 40 chapters of the book of Job, they are mainly accusing Job himself of some hidden sin for which he is now reaping the consequences. But God doesn't say, "You have not spoken the truth about Job..." No. He said, "You have not spoken the truth about me..." About God. They said that God was just and God was all knowing. That seems fair and these are things we would agree with. So what was it that they got wrong?

I'm not sure. But they were sure insistent that Job deserved to be punished. They were sure the only reason that would lead God to act the way that he did was because Job deserved it. But we know, from chapter 1, that there was something else going on in the universe, a conversation between Satan and God and we know from those verses that God had incredible confidence in Job. They presumed that Job must have been guilty because their little minds could not conceive of another reason for God active the way he did and that he would act in a way to punish Job, the most righteous of men. Their little minds were boxing God in, saying that he must act in a certain way. They were telling God how he should act.  And God wasn't going to let that stand.

I think that a valuable lesson that I have learned is that God is very creative and possibly delights in solving impossible problems in ways that are (a) consistent with his character and (b) not thought of by even his friends. What God expects is that we expect God to act fully in character but not slaves to our pre-conceived ideas. We know he loves us and that he will act fully in line with that, but how he does it...well that's the genius of God. 

The Prince and the Princesses: Chapter 3

The next morning, all the royal siblings gathered in the bedroom of the youngest princess. They were very surprised because they found a very large turtle under the pillow of the youngest princess. 

"We have to do something with that...that reptile" exclaimed the elder princess. "Are they reptiles? Or are they amphibians? Anyway, we need to get it out of here before the king and queen find out."

The royal prince, who was wise in the ways of turtles, stated definitively, "They are reptiles. And I have a plan."

"What?" the princesses exclaimed.

"We just have to sneak the turtle out of the castle and put it back in the moat. The moat is big enough and the moat's water will act to keep it from growing bigger. The same way that goldfish stay small because of the aquarium where they are kept." he said.

The princesses were impressed. "But how can we sneak a turtle the size of an elephant" for that's how big it was now-"out of the castle without someone noticing?" asked the eldest, ever the practical one.

The youngest looked out her window. "Well, that's the moat down there. Couldn't we just tip the turtle out the window and let it fall into the moat?"

"You mean like a high dive?" asked the prince. The princess nodded. "No, that's too high. We're two floors up. It would be like the world's biggest turtle belly flop. And it would really hurt...hey, what is this turtle's name going to be anyway."

"Bob" the youngest pronounced definitively.

"Pfffft. Bob. He'll be embarrassed to just have name like that. Even dogs have a pedigree name that is grand sounding."

"Ok, fine. Beethoven. But I'll just call him Bob for short."

The prince looked a bit confused because "Bob" was actually a girl. But he didn't want to ruin the mood, so he just went with it, figuring that they could sort the whole gender naming and pronoun thing later.

"Anyway, I think she has a good idea, it just needs to be worked on a little." He rushed out of the room and came back with a length of fifty feet of rope. Taking one end, he fashioned a cradle with the pillow under Bob's belly and tied the other end to the door, the very same door they had use to pull the princess' tooth. Working together, they lifted Bob onto the sill of the window.

"Ok, go downstairs. I and your sister will slowly lower Bob down. Then when Bob is near the water, you cut the rope and voila, Bob escapes into the moat and we're good." explained the prince.

The youngest princess ran downstairs, heedless of the fact the scissors do not mix with running. Meanwhile, the prince and eldest princess slowly levered the turtle over the edge, letting out the rope by bits. It was a good thing no one was looking at that side of the castle that day.

At just about the time when Bob was a few feed from the bottom, there was a knock at the youngest princess' door. The prince and eldest princess looked at each other, but they couldn't answer the door without letting go of the rope. So they tried to be quiet, hoping that whoever it was would give and go away. Meanwhile the youngest began to work on the rope to let Bob go, even though he had a few feet to go, trying to get a head start on cutting through the thick ropes.

The knocking persisted and there was a muffled voice and then the same voice louder. The door handle turned and both prince and princess called out "No!" but to no avail. The door opened with a jerk, Bob dropped a few feet with a jerk into the water, the rope smacked the youngest princess on the head, she fell over onto Bob's back, the rope snapped where she had been cutting and they both tipped into the moat. People in the castle speculate that her dip in the moat permanently stunted her growth.